Author’s Notes: Here’s the ending… hope you like.
Stave Ten
“I’ve been alone for so long
Forgotten by the world, forgotten to myself
Your effervescent eyes have awakened me
And brushed the dust away.”
-- Waking Up Beside You
“Was that a knock?” Subaru asked, after staring, dumbfounded, at Seishirou for a long minute.
Seishirou looked just as poleaxed. “Yes,” he finally said. “There it is again,” he added, unnecessarily.
“Well, we’d better get it,” Subaru said faintly, getting off the sofa.
“But there can’t actually be anyone there,” Seishirou pointed out, following him.
“I know.”
“And we can’t open the door.”
“I know.” Subaru walked to the front door. The knob yielded easily and he pulled the door open.
The world twisted -
The hallway - if one could really call it a hallway - made him think vaguely of a black hole, and he had to fight to keep his breakfast down and the door open. Kakyou stepped through sedately and toed off his shoes. “Konnichi wa, Subaru-san, Seishirou-san,” he said politely, as Subaru slammed the door shut before he could be sick.
They stared at him.
Seishirou found his voice first. “How the hell did you get here?”
“I had Kamui send me,” Kakyou said calmly.
“But now you’re stuck here, too,” Subaru said weakly.
“Not at all,” he replied. “I soul-binded to Hokuto. She can pull me out whenever I give the signal.”
Seishirou blinked at Subaru.
Subaru blinked back.
“What’s that got to do with us?” Seishirou finally asked.
“Well, unless you two want to stay here for the rest of eternity,” Kakyou said, sounding vaguely amused. “You can soul-bind to me too, and when Hokuto pulls me out, you’ll come with me.”
Subaru’s eyes brightened. “Of course!” Then his face fell. “But I’m not sure I remember the spell. I never had to do it in real life.”
“Hokuto taught me,” Kakyou said. “Though I can’t perform the spell, I can teach it to you, and you can do it.”
Subaru’s lips twitched into a smile. “You’re prepared for anything.”
“This is Hokuto-chan we’re talking about,” Kakyou reminded him.
“Very true,” Subaru said. “All right, teach me, then I can bind to you and Seishirou to me - ”
“We’re already soul-bound,” Seishirou said, and took one of Subaru’s hand, delicately tracing the pentagram as a reminder.
“Oh, yes,” Subaru said. “Perhaps I’ll do it to you anyway. I really don’t like the thought of you getting stuck here without me.”
Seishirou paused. “Good point.”
“How’s Kamui doing?” Subaru asked Kakyou anxiously.
“He’s . . . coping,” Kakyou said. “Better than I would have expected, though he had a really nasty run-in with Fuuma and that couldn’t have helped . . . but if you think you’re going to your Afterlife in peace, forget it; Hokuto promised him that he’d get to see you again. So he can tell you all about it.”
Subaru visibly relaxed. “Good.”
“How are you two doing?” Kakyou asked, eyebrows raised. “And why are you so young?”
“We’re, um, fine,” Subaru said brightly.
“Mm hmm,” Kakyou replied, giving them both an amused look.
“And we think the Tree just does something weird like sending you back to the happiest time of your life.” Subaru shrugged. “Don’t ask me to explain.”
“Why don’t you just teach him the spell so we can get out of this godforsaken Tree,” Seishirou suggested.
Kakyou smiled. “Gladly.”
^^^^
Keichii was surprised to see Kamui on his doorstep, and even more surprised to see that Kamui was halfway to hysterical. He ushered the boy inside, closed the door firmly, and made him drink a mug of tea. Kamui only got halfway through it before dissolving into tears. Keichii had no idea what to do, so he did what he figured anyone would do; put his arms around Kamui and try to soothe him back into some semblance of calm.
Kamui was wobbling back and forth; Keichii quickly sat down on the bed and pulled Kamui into his lap. As an only child who had always been friendly with everybody but friends with nobody, Keichii didn’t have much experience in the way of comforting someone. All he could think to do was hold Kamui and wait and try to decipher what Kamui was babbling about.
The words were pouring from his mouth so quickly that Keichii had to devote most of his attention to figuring out what Kamui was saying, and therefore the larger meaning of it was going right over his head. It wasn’t until Kamui’s words had trickled to a stop and he fell silent, shivering, that Keichii started to put the pieces together.
He was certainly no fool; he had known, in the back of his mind, that the earthquakes that had killed his parents were not natural events. He had simply chosen to ignore this, knowing that there was nothing he could do about it. He had also suspected that Subaru’s death hadn’t quite been suicide, but he didn’t even dare ask Kamui for any specifics.
As for Kamui’s behavior in the past few days . . . he knew that something big was going on. He had limited knowledge of onmyoujitsu, but he’d taken a history class and learned the basic theory behind it. By the time Kamui’s rush of words had stopped, Keichii felt he had a pretty good idea of what was going on.
What to do about it? There he had no clue.
He had not known that Kamui had been in love with Subaru; his heart dropped into his shoes at this revelation. Still, he managed to not let that affect his tone of voice and continued to murmur soothing words.
“I’m sorry,” Kamui sniffled.
“What for?” Keichii asked.
Kamui pulled away, wiping his sleeve over his eyes. Keichii pulled out a tissue and handed it to him. Kamui’s eyes were red and swollen; his throat was raw from crying. “I don’t know what for,” he said miserably.
“If it’s for crying, you shouldn’t be sorry,” Keichii said, recalling his mother’s funeral and feeling tears welling up to his own eyes. “And it shouldn’t be for telling me this stuff, either. You need someone to talk to.”
“No, not for that . . .” Kamui looked steadfastly away.
“What, then?”
“B-Because . . .” Apparently blurting things out had been working for Kamui, so he decided to try it again. “Because I know how you feel about me and . . . and I want to . . . I-I really like you, Keichii, but I loved Subaru so much and I . . .” His voice trailed into more tears.
Keichii hugged him again, not sure what to say. “It’s okay, Kamui.”
“But it’s not,” Kamui said, pulling away. “Nothing that hurts you is okay! Because . . . I . . . I care about you. I want to love you . . . and now I know how Subaru felt, because he wanted to love me but he couldn’t, because of Seishirou . . .”
“Kamui, it’s okay.” Keichii gave Kamui a gentle shake, trying to fend off his hysterics. “I understand, and . . . it’ll get better.” He gave Kamui one of his cheerful smiles. “I know that probably sounds silly of me, after everything you’ve been through. But I think it will.”
“But . . . how can you even look at me?” Kamui burst out. “I-I killed someone today. I . . . I couldn’t even help it.”
Keichii looked away. “I’m not saying I like the idea of you being a murderer . . . but it’s not you. You just said, you couldn’t help it. You did it to help Subaru, didn’t you?”
Kamui nodded, sniffling. “I won’t do it again, I swear . . . I’ll keep fighting it.”
“Then it’s okay.” Keichii gave him another hug. “Subaru would want you to be happy, Kamui. Like I want you to be happy. So anything I can do to help . . . you just let me know. Okay?”
Kamui hesitated, then nodded again. “Yeah. Okay.”
“Then I think I’d better take you home,” Keichii said. “You’re worn out.”
“Yeah,” Kamui agreed.
^^^^
Subaru took an inordinate amount of time doing the soul-binding, but neither Kakyou nor Seishirou minded. After all, they only had one chance at this.
“How long were we here, anyway?” Subaru asked.
“About five days,” Kakyou replied.
They both gaped at him. “Five days?” Subaru finally echoed. “That’s it? God, it seems like months.”
“Leave it to the Tree to make forever last even longer,” Seishirou muttered.
“Well, are we ready?” Kakyou asked.
Subaru tested all the soul-bindings for the eighteenth time. “Yeah, ready as we’ll ever be.”
^^^^
The Tree didn’t make it easy for them.
Subaru somehow found Seishirou in the fog of sakura petals and clung to him, pressing his face against Seishirou’s chest to shield it. He could feel the older man’s arms tighten around him.
Kakyou had gone ahead of them, and it had only been a few minutes before Subaru had felt him tugging on their bond. This was heartening; it meant that Kakyou had made it out safely.
Then again, the Tree had kept a hold on them for longer; it might be reluctant to let them go . . .
Subaru banished such thoughts and focused all his energy on the soul-bond, pulling on it desperately. He thought briefly of Kamui, and Hokuto -
But it was fighting against him, and Subaru was forced to fight back with everything he had, until something gave -
Which it did, just as Subaru’s energy started to give out.
And Subaru tumbled to his knees at Hokuto’s feet.
“SUBARU-CHAAAAAAAN!”
Subaru started to laugh, and cry, at the same time, and Hokuto threw herself into his arms. He was knocked over from the force of her momentum, and both of them toppled to the ground. Hokuto was crying, too, but there was a mile wide grin on her face.
Kakyou turned to Seishirou. “They’re very cute, aren’t they.”
Seishirou smirked. “Definitely.” He was glad to notice that both he and Subaru had returned to their proper ages.
“Shut up, both of you!” Hokuto got to her feet, dragging Subaru with her. “We’ve hardly seen each other in nine years, give us a break!” She turned to Subaru and gave him another bone-bruising hug. “Now you have to go see Kamui, okay? I’ll stay here and have a little . . . talk . . . with Sei-chan.” She grinned wickedly.
“Uh oh,” Seishirou said.
“You’d better believe it!” Hokuto cackled. “I want to know what happened while you two were in there, and Subaru will just turn all crimson like he is now and stammer a bunch if I ask him. Which is a good sign, but still! He needs to see Kamui. Kakyou, you go with him so you can pull them into a Dreamscape, it’ll be a lot easier for them to talk that way.”
Kakyou nodded complacently.
Subaru turned and gave Seishirou a quick kiss, ignoring Hokuto’s crow of triumph. “I’ll see you later.”
^^^^
“So?”
“So what?”
“So what haaaappppeeeennneeeddd?”
Seishirou folded his arms and smirked at Hokuto. “That’s for us to know and for you to keep your prying nose out of.”
Hokuto looked amused. “As if that will keep me out of it for a second,” she remarked.
“Oh, I know,” Seishirou said. “But you’re fun to tease.”
“Sei-chaaaaan!” Hokuto pouted. “Tell me!”
“No.”
“Please?”
“No.”
“Pretty please?”
“No.”
“With sugar on top?”
“No.”
“With Subaru and chocolate sauce on top?”
Seishirou paused. “What, no whipped cream?”
Hokuto’s eyes gleamed. “All right, whipped cream too.”
“And since we’re dead, how are you going to go about producing this? I don’t think you can just go down to the local cornerstore. Also, I don’t think Subaru-kun will be pleased that you’re using him as a bargaining chip.”
“Oh, he won’t mind, and if he does . . . he can go soak his head.” Hokuto grinned manically. “Now tell me.”
“Your way of persuasiveness is so . . . elegant, Hokuto-chan.”
“I could be threatening instead of bribing,” Hokuto said. “Keep that in mind, and spill.”
Seishirou smiled charmingly. “We settled our differences.”
Hokuto paused. “You know what I hate about you, Sei-chan?”
“What?”
“Your way of answering a question without giving ANY INFORMATION AT ALL!” Hokuto grabbed Seishirou by the front of the shirt and started shaking him. “Now tell me! What happened! With my brother! Before I kill you!”
Seishirou was laughing too hard to reply.
^^^^
Subaru was both relieved and surprised to see that Kamui was not in his room moping by himself. He was, in point of fact, in his room moping with Keichii, who was doing his best to keep him from moping at all. Subaru was even more surprised to see that Keichii was, in some small measure, succeeding in his endeavor.
He had no wish to disturb them, or eavesdrop, so he and Kakyou went downstairs to wait until Keichii left. Subaru considered having a few words with Sorata, (on the proper care and feeding of Kamui, of course), but decided that the monk was fully capable of taking care of Kamui himself. Especially with Keichii’s help.
The other boy left not long after that; Subaru gathered that he had only been taking Kamui home. He and Kakyou went back upstairs; Subaru plopped onto Kamui’s bed.
The world blurred a little; Subaru was far more accustomed to the sensation that Kamui was, so it didn’t bother him. Kamui blinked a few times. When he was expecting it, the sudden shift of reality only bothered him a little, but when he wasn’t . . .
“You should warn me first,” he said, catching sight of Kakyou. “But I’m glad you’re okay. In, um, a manner of speaking, that is. I - Subaru!”
Subaru had been waiting for Kamui to notice him with an amused smile. He was practically knocked over as Kamui flung himself into his arms. Subaru hugged him tightly as Kamui started crying for the second time that day.
This spate of tears was relatively short, in comparison to the first one. He pulled away after a few minutes, wiping his eyes. “I feel like a baby all the time these days,” he said, giving a trembling laugh.
“Don’t worry about it,” Subaru said. He noticed that Kakyou was conspicuously absent, and silently thanked the other man. He gave Kamui another hug. “I hear you’ve been having a hard time lately.”
“I . . . yeah.” Kamui rubbed his eyes and let Subaru hold him.
“I’m sorry I left you,” Subaru said softly. “That was . . . very selfish of me. I didn’t think of you, and I had promised I would protect you until this was over. I thought I would never get the chance to ask your forgiveness.”
“’s okay,” Kamui mumbled. “I . . . I was really okay . . . until Fuuma . . .”
Subaru put his finger under Kamui’s chin, making the younger boy meet his eyes. “Tell me?” he asked quietly.
Kamui hesitated, then nodded, and related what had happened in a very calm voice. It hurt a little less, now that he had told Keichii, and he managed to get through all of it without his voice cracking once. Subaru simply listened and tried to hide his anger.
When Kamui was done, Subaru gave him another hug. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here,” he whispered.
Kamui clung to him, knowing in the back of his mind that it was probably the last chance he’d get to do so. For a while, anyway. “Nn . . . I’m okay. Keichii helped.”
Subaru smiled. “I’m glad.”
“How are you and Seishirou-san, anyway?” Kamui asked curiously.
Subaru’s blush was enough to answer his question.
Kamui grinned. “I’m glad too, then. Because I . . . I want you to be happy.”
“I am,” Subaru said, fighting the blush down. “Ne, Seishirou and I are going to try to figure out what to do about the Tree. And you being the Sakurazukamori. Okay? We’ll try to come up with something for you.”
Kamui nodded. “Thanks.”
Subaru smiled. “So you’ll be seeing me again.”
Kamui managed a smile back. “That’s good.”
“But now I have to go, because I can only imagine what my sister’s done to Seishirou by now,” Subaru said. He leaned forward and kissed Kamui gently on the lips, long enough to mean something, but not so long as to mean the wrong thing. Kamui’s eyes widened in surprise, then they closed and he relaxed into the kiss.
Subaru gave him another hug and stood. “You know,” he said conversationally as the Dreamscape started to fade back to reality, “you should try that with Keichii sometime.”
And before Kamui could answer, he was gone.
^^^^
“Chocolate sauce and whipped cream?” Subaru asked, raising an eyebrow and giving Seishirou one of those ‘don’t-make-me-make-you-sleep-on-the-sofa’ looks.
Seishirou smirked. “What, you don’t think it’d be fun?”
Subaru could feel himself starting to turn crimson. “Well, I suppose it might be . . .”
“Subaru-chan, I knew you had an adventurous side!” Hokuto cheered.
Subaru turned to her. “What does this have to do with you?”
“Um . . .” Hokuto turned red.
“Never mind,” Subaru decided. “I really don’t want to know, do I.”
“No,” Hokuto and Seishirou said in unison.
^^^^
Kamui spent a large part of the evening convincing Sorata that he was just fine, damn it, and all he really wanted was to spend the after dinner hours curled up with a book. Well, that, and maybe skip classes the next day. Sorata was evidently hesitant to believe this, but after a while he gave in and let Kamui hole up in his room.
::Sakurazukamori!::
For a while, Kamui tried to ignore the Tree’s incessant calls to him, but it soon became impossible to concentrate. Finally, he threw the book down. “What do you want?”
A rush of images flooded his brain at once; most of them were disjointed and few of
them made any sense. He did, however, pick up the basic message; the Tree was in danger.
After a minute, Kamui got it. It made perfect sense, after all; Fuuma would not allow him to have an extra power source. So he was taking the problem right to the root - no pun intended - and trying to destroy the Tree.
Hokuto had said, in her first visit, that it was possible to simply blow up the Tree. And it was, Kamui had to admit, certainly Fuuma’s style.
Not to mention a neat answer to his problem.
Kamui let out a strangled laugh. Fuuma must have no idea he’s doing me a favor with this, he thought.
The Tree lashed at him angrily. ::HELP ME!::
“No,” Kamui said slowly. “I don’t think I will.”
Now that he was concentrating on the Tree, he could feel every magical blast Fuuma hit it with. The pain started to bleed out from the Tree and seep into him; he grit his teeth against it.
The Tree was fighting back, naturally. Kamui reached out and started to draw the Tree’s power into himself. It hurt - hurt a lot more than what had just been happening - but it was the only way he could think of to suppress the Tree’s defenses.
He could feel the Tree’s growing anger - and its growing desperation. But he held tightly to it, keeping it from fighting back, ignoring the pain as best he could.
One final burst of energy, then the Tree’s presence faded from inside him, and with an agony unlike anything he’d ever known, Kamui was left alone.
He drew in a trembling breath, making fire rip through his lungs, and everything went dark.
^^^^
“Is he okay?” Subaru asked anxiously, bending over Kamui’s limp form.
“Well, he’s still breathing, and that’s always a good start,” Seishirou said. “And I don’t think the Tree being destroyed would kill him . . . though he’s lucky he wasn’t bonded to it very long or very strongly; it would have killed me.”
Subaru nodded. “I suppose this solved his problem.”
Seishirou didn’t look reassured. “In a way. I can’t believe he kept the Tree from fighting back, though. That must have taken more self-control than I ever had.”
Subaru had learned Hokuto’s trick of being visible and audible when the occasion called for it. He leaned over Kamui and started calling his name.
Kamui’s eyes flickered open. “Am I dead?” he asked weakly, seeing his present company.
“No, we just came to make sure you were all right,” Subaru said.
“I think so . . .” Kamui looked down at himself as if to make sure he was still all there. “It’s gone, though. I can’t feel the Tree’s presence anymore.”
Seishirou nodded. “There’s only a crater left where it used to be.”
“I thought I was dying . . .” Kamui’s eyes were slightly glazed over. “It hurt so much . . .”
Subaru wanted badly to hug him, but without Kakyou there to pull them into a Dreamscape, it was impossible.
“At least it’s over, though,” Kamui said wearily. “I don’t have to be the Sakurazukamori anymore. And I’ll have a day or two to recover before the final battle.”
“If Fuuma had been smart, he would’ve waited,” Seishirou said.
“Nn,” Kamui replied. “I’m not sure he realized it would affect me this way. He probably only saw it as an advantage I had that he had to take away from me.”
“Well,” Subaru said, and realizing there was really nothing he could say to that. “Are you okay?”
Kamui nodded slowly. “Yeah. I’m okay. Tired is all.” His eyes closed again.
“We’ll go,” Subaru said quietly. “You get some rest. And good luck, Kamui . . . I’ll be watching out for you.”
“Thanks,” Kamui said, and his breathing slowed. Subaru knew that he’d fallen asleep.
Seishirou stood and extended his hand to Subaru, who took it.
“You think he’ll be okay?” Subaru asked.
“I think so,” Seishirou said. “I think he’ll win the final battle, if that’s what you mean. And I think he’ll do better without the Tree.” He half-smiled. “It makes a mess out of everyone’s life.”
“Oh, sure, blame it all on the Tree,” Subaru said, amused.
“Thank you. I think I will.”
Subaru laughed. “C’mon. Hokuto’s waiting for us.”
“But what about the chocolate sauce and whipped cream?”
“I am not an ice cream sundae, thank you very much.”
“Not even for me?” Seishirou asked.
“You know, it’s fun listening to you whine.”
“Don’t mock me, Subaru-kun. You’d like being an ice cream sundae and you know it.”
“I suppose,” Subaru said.
“Then quit arguing. Besides, Hokuto was saying something about a Christmas party . . .”
“But Christmas was almost a week ago.”
“Yes, but we celebrated it by falling off a bridge, so you can hardly blame her for wanting to have a party.”
Subaru considered this. “You’re right there.”
“Thank you.”
“Now stop being an arrogant bastard. Let’s go find Hokuto.”
“Shouldn’t we get each other Christmas presents?”
Subaru gave Seishirou an amused look. “What, aren’t you going to be my present? I’ll be yours . . .”
Seishirou smirked. “Good idea.”
“No unwrapping until after the party though.”
“Subaru-kun . . . that’s unfair.”
“Life’s unfair. And afterlife is even more unfair. Get used to it.”
^^^^
TB/X Fics
Home